Seasons Change...

Boy, has it been a while since I've written. Well, I guess there is a time and place for it all, huh? So, I will start by saying this... I am not who I was during my last post. I am slowly getting things in order. Nothing comes without struggle or at least a true test of patience... and I think I have had a good understanding of both. Struggling within your self has to be the most difficult obstacle in life. No one knows you better than you, and no one can hurt or hold you back more than you can. I have been losing the battle within myself for so long that I am finding it most difficult to adjust to this new found freedom inside. Granted I still stress and worry and feel bad when things don't work out how I planned. But for the most part, I have a vision and understanding of what I want and need now. With that comes a really good feeling. Patience has turned into one of the greatest virtues for me. I accept that I have to be patient and allow things to come into my life when I am truly ready, not just when I think I am ready. Also, in order to be ready, I have to learn to let go. I have realized in these past couple of months that the people around me are on totally different paths than where I want to be. In light of this, I have begun to distance myself from those that have nothing to offer my life and the improvement of it. Throughout this process, I have found that most of the people in my life added little to nothing productive... which means I have basically distanced myself from everyone. I still mainly socialize with a selective few, but in all honesty... I have nothing in common with people I was so close to before. It's sad really. But at the same time I feel a little liberated. It's like finally figuring out a riddle after pondering over it for hours. I finally figured out what was blurring my focus in life and can now really address it head on. Life has been much more inspirational and productive than before. My future is indeed in focus.

First on the agenda... graduation. I plan to rid myself of Wayne State in December of next year. No exceptions. That is the goal. I am so ready to walk across that stage. It is about time.

Second... SAVE SAVE SAVE!! I have x amount of time to save and plan my finances for the future. Grad school and living expenses ain't cheap.

Third... proceed to make my huge leap out of state. As hard as it may be for me, I know it is what I truly want and have to do. So Cali... I'm coming soon. Check for me in 2010...

Fourth... Grad School in Cali-For-N-I-A. Education is key to everything. Knowledge is power, and I plan on ruling. Sooooo, expensive higher learning here I come!! Hopefully I will be on someone's TV soon (or at least behind someone you see on TV).


I have more faith than ever that my goals WILL come true. It gets rough from time to time and I feel myself begin to waiver. But how would we appreciate the wonder and beauty of our futures if we never endured struggles in the process???

With that being said, I can close this on a positive note. I welcome change in my life as well as the obstacles. It has all made me stronger and pushed me to focus. If it is all bliss then what would be the point?